- Capitalism - He who dies with the most toys, wins.
- Hari Krishna - He who plays with the most toys, wins.
- Judaism - He who buys toys at the lowest price, wins.
- Catholicism - He who denies himself the most toys, wins.
- Anglican - They were our toys first.
- Greek Orthodox - No, they were OURS first.
- Branch Davidians - He who dies playing with the biggest toys, wins.
- Atheism - There is no toy maker.
- Polytheism - There are many toy makers.
- Evolutionism - The toys made themselves.
- Church of Christ, Scientist - We are the toys.
- Communism - Everyone gets the same number of toys, and you go straight to hell if we catch you selling yours.
- B’Hai - All toys are just fine with us.
- Amish - Toys with batteries are surely a sin.
- Taoism - The doll is as important as the dumptruck.
- Mormonism - Every boy can have as many toys as he wants.
- Voodoo - Let me borrow that doll for a second.
- Hedonism - Screw the rule book! Let’s play!
- Hinduism - He who plays with bags of plastic farm animals, loses.
- 7th Day Adventist - He who plays with his toys on Saturday, loses.
- Church of Christ - He whose toys make music, loses.
- Baptist - Once played, always played.
- Jehovah’s Witnesses - He who sells the most toys door-to-door, wins.
- Pentecostalism - He whose toys can talk, wins.
- Existentialism - Toys are a figment of your imagination.
- Confucianism - Once a toy is dipped in the water, it is no longer dry.
- Non-denominationalism - We don’t care where the toys came from, let’s just play with them.
- Agnosticism - It is not possible to know whether toys make a damn bit of difference.
[All jokes are believed to be in
the public domain. If you feel one of these belongs to you, please
let us know the details and we will either remove the
material or provide a link at your request.]
Unless otherwise noted, all photos and text is Copyright © Richard G Lowe, Jr.
