Richard Lowe Jr
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One Liners 

Talk is cheap until you hire a lawyer. 

I've never been in love. I've always been a lawyer. 

LAWSUIT, n. A machine you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. 

LAWYER, n. Someone who prepares a 10,000-word document and calls it a brief. 

I take an instant dislike to lawyers. It saves a lot of time. 

Two very rich people got divorced, and their lawyers lived happily ever after. 

Hell hath no fury like the lawyer of a woman scorned. 

Clothes don't necessarily make the man, but a good suit makes a lawyer. 

My lawyer introduces himself as a criminal lawyer. I think that's pretty self-aware of him. 

He's a great lawyer. He once got a sodomy charge changed to following too close. 

He once got the jury so confused, they sent the judge to jail. 

I did some research and came up with the perfect weight for a lawyer. Twenty seven ounces, including the urn. 

This country has witnessed a dramatic increase of new lawyers and computers in the last decade - unfortunately for most of us, the lawyers did not get twice as intelligent, twice as fast, and half as expensive every two years!! 

A lawyer is an expert on justice in much the same way your average hooker is an expert on love. 

Did you hear that the Post Office just recalled their latest stamps? They had pictures of lawyers on them . . . and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on.

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Unless otherwise noted, all photos and text is Copyright © Richard G Lowe, Jr.